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About Bamenda

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Oh, and let me tell you bout my fav spot—the secret alley by Moonlight Corner. Nobody really talks about it. It's kinda hidden, sort of like my thoughts during a deep massage session. I once ended up there off-chance after closing a session early; I bumped into an artist painting the sunset. He said, "You ever think about how ephemeral love is?" And I just sat there, marveling how the city never stopped surprisin me.